The expectation from others…
This is an easily available feeling yet too costly in today’s life. You should stop expecting from others as your expectation can lead you to heartbreak and irritation. You must know what can be expected and what you should not. You must discover things for what you need to stop expecting from others.
Your expectations from others set an attachment towards getting something specific and when you don’t get the desired result then you feel cheated. You hate that person and feel irritated.
When you start to expect from others, you leave that little room of creativity and efforts that needs to be taken by you for you. You should save yourself from frustrations that can arise from those expectations that didn’t fulfill your requirement.
We always think someone will be something or will do something and we will get benefitted from that. We all know we don’t have any control over other’s actions and other’s thinking then why we always fall into the trap of expectation and get disappointed. So, stop expecting from others for your mental health and peace of mind.
Why expectation can be dangerous?
Sometimes we put extremely high expectations from other people. It is an accepted thing by all that at some stage of life we make some expectation from people we know. And we think that our partner will support and fulfill our requirement in our expected way.
Expecting that your friends or partner will fix your problem and will support you is never a better choice. Your expectation can be dangerous. you must stop expecting from others and starting accepting the thing that we must move our block on our own.
Establishing very high expectations from people around you can create an environment with pressure for the people for completing your expectations and fulfilling your requirement. It is like taking away their freedom and put them in a cage filled with expectations.
In reality, the only person you should depend on for anything must be you. We go through most of our life expecting from others.
- A father expects his kid to pursue some career according to him not what his kid likes.
- An employer expects its employee to complete all given tasks on time with perfection without asking for any resource that its employee will need.
- A writer expects his reader to like his articles without reviewing what his reader really likes.
- A film producer just produces any film expecting the public will like it because of some famous actor.
- A lover expects his/her, partner, to understand all his/her feeling without saying anything.
I just want to say, “Stop expecting from others, expect anything and everything from yourself only“. This statement may seem upsetting to you, but believe me, you will find this sentence worthy and you will believe me at some stage in life.
People set expectations every day and always make their decision in the illusion of expectation. That, they can achieve something when some XYZ person will bring some sort of solution to their problem and that expectation can be dangerous for themselves.
The expectation from others can be dangerous for you as well as for the person to whom you are expecting to fulfill your wish. For Example:
When you expect from your partner that He/She always will be with you and give His/Her most of the to you only. Make yourself your partner’s top priority, Take you on vacation, Fulfilling all the life enjoying needs. Then all problem begins from that expectation only.
When your partner misses anything from your expectation, you feel disappointed. 02 or 03 times you handle this disappointment but your expectation increases and it didn’t get fulfilled, all your expectation converts into irritation and ultimately frustration.
Because of this developed frustration, you think your partner never cares for you or he/she doesn’t want to spend time with you. Even you can think of breaking your relationship because you feel unsatisfied in that relationship.
All of this happens because of Expectation and expecting people around you to fulfill your desires. that is why I used this sentence earlier, ” Expectation can be dangerous “. So, stop expecting from others and believe in yourself for accomplishing any of your wishes.
Stop Expecting Start Accepting
I know, I am asking you a lot. It is not easy to stop expecting from people around you all at once. But you need to learn to stop expecting from others because it is not necessary the person you need now for your expectation now can be the same after some days.
A person who supports you now, is not necessarily will support you further in the future. So, how do you think you will deal with your life in this uncertainty. You must maintain your balance of life by depending on yourself only and taking all control. So you should now stop expecting and start accepting.
Don’t put any burden on others and make them find some solution or fulfill your expectation because you are afraid that they can fail to meet your expectation at some stage. Let them love you freely and do something for you according to them. And in this way, your people will love to do anything for you because they will really care for you without any expectation, without any pressure.
You must accept if you don’t leave expecting your life will be filled with endless expectations from others that will become the reason for your heartaches. So, in place of Expecting Let’s choose Accepting. When you change your expectation with acceptation your world will change immediately. No one is perfect in this world and to be honest, I don’t believe such as perfection there noting exist in this world with perfection. Always there is some space for improvement.
We can EXPECT that when we plant a seed, it would take some years to fully develop into a tree. We could try to hurry, tell possibilities, and the way by which that seed will grow faster into a tree. We can that seed to grow faster and offer our opinion on what should it become. or we can just ACCEPT the fact that seed will take its time and grow at its own pace and will become whatever this needs to be in its own way. So, without wasting time we must Stop Expecting from others and Start Accepting the reality we already know.
How to Stop Expecting and Start accepting from others?
Now you know why I want you to stop expecting from others. You may be thinking expecting from others is useful in a way and yes it is true. Expectation gives us a sense of motivation and direction to believe. this creates hope that not all things lose their charm and there is still someplace to shine again.
But when this expectation starts to influence our mind and thought process too much. When we lose ourselves in some other’s wish and don’t follow our own path then it starts to affect our wellbeing, our nature, our creativity, our proactive nature towards the problem, and our decision-making ability in abnormal situations.
Here are some tips that can help you To stop expecting from others and start believing in yourself by creating self-confidence and motivation to your inner self.
1. Break your Big Expectations into a small milestone
We normally expect something from others either when we are not able to fulfill our requirements or we want to ease our work and decrease our burden. if you really want to stop expecting from others and act on your own you can have two choices:
- Don’t be lazy and do your all work yourself or
- Break you Big expectation in small parts try to achieve them one by one and you will find all work completed without expecting from anyone.
2. Practice Acceptance rather than perfection
If you tend to be a perfectionist, it is quite possible that you will demand perfection from others and your expectation level will increase from others. This can seriously damage your personal and professional relationships. You should aim to practice Acceptance and Improvement. When you initiate this practice you will soon feel the change of behavior among people near you. No-one is born perfect after all we are human and there is always some flaw within us.
3. Discover and drive for Realistic goals
When deciding your goal either short-term or long-term aim to understand the resources needed to achieve that. Who know and set realistic goal can expect higher not from others but from their own.
4. Prioritize things as per your Requirement
When your mind is clear with things that you require now and that you will require later. you will find your life much easier comparatively. Always focus on top 03 things which are required to spend your normal life. Plan for it and put all of your effort to achieve it. After that only go for your other requirement.
5. Don’t expect people to read your mind.
Never expect anyone to know how you feel and what you want. You must talk to them about your needs and wants. People can’t read minds even if you think they know you very well. You have to open your mouth and say what you feel. People have very different sets of emotions and requirements. So, don’t hold anyone accountable to fulfill your expectation and you should stop expecting from others.
What you should stop Expecting from others Right Now?
Expectations can give you heartache and disappointment. You can feel irritated, lost, and worthless because of this. People, their emotions and their thoughts are not in our control. It is quite possible that someone going to fail you on time if you expect too much from him/Her. Sometimes and in some conditions, it is natural to expect Love, Respect, and attention from people you know well and love. However, there are some things you must stop expecting from others.
1. Expecting someone to do what you think is right
You should learn to open to suggestions and solutions and become tolerant of how people think and do things. Because it is often possible that whatever you like is not considered good by other people. If you impose your idea on someone else and expect to get a better result. Then, believe me, you are living in a world of illusion.
When you discuss things with people, share your thoughts, and also want to know their opinion then there is much possibility you can find some improvement in your idea or you can get a better one. In this way, people can give you more than your expectation and you will not feel disappointed.
2. Expecting someone to be Perfect
Are you perfect in your life?
Have you done all things before error-free? or
All your work didn’t ever need any improvement.
I don’t think you are going to answer this as, “YES”. When you are not a perfectionist then how can you expect someone else to do something in perfection. We always have some error, we just accept it and try to improve ourselves always.
3. Expecting someone to fight your battle
They love you and you can count for anything on people around you. But you can’t always expect them to stand on your side and protect you. You must learn to be enough for yourself and stop expecting from others. You must not depend on anyone but yourself for your fallback in your tough times. People around you can only help you when they are available and capable of doing things. It will be a little selfish if you want to run for you always when you need them.
4. Expecting someone to never change
I want to take a few minutes and remember nature, the appearance, and attitude of yourself 02 years ago.
Do you think you are the same person as you were 02 years ago?
I don’t think you will answer YES. So, I just want to say a simple thing when you can’t be the same and got changed in just 02 years, how you can expect someone other to never change. So, stop expecting from others and start accepting people around you as they are.
5. Expecting someone to care for you and make you Smile
Caring and making you smile can be someone’s feeling and choice for you but if you make this necessary for that person then this becomes a headache for your relationship. Someone is caring for you doesn’t mean He/She is responsible for your well-being and it is not necessary that He/She will always care for you.
Why Don’t you care for yourself and make yourself smile?
If you keep expecting others to take care of you then it is possible that you will end up in tears. Find your reason to make you smile and care for you. Don’t let anyone else take care of your emotions. Stop expecting from others and find a way to make you smile.
6. Expecting someone to lead your way and Solve your problems
It is ok if you don’t know something and want some expert advice to solve your problems. But this not at all good if expect someone to resolve all your issues and lead your way to resolve all your problems. By the way, understanding your problem and resolving it on your own is much more useful than expecting someone to do it for you.